couples
Couples Therapy in Auckland & Online
A somatic, attachment-based approach to transforming relationships
Relationships can be our greatest source of connection — and our deepest source of pain.
Many couples come to therapy feeling stuck, disconnected, or caught in painful cycles they can’t seem to shift. Whether you’re navigating constant conflict, intimacy challenges, or simply feeling like something’s missing, therapy offers a safe space to explore and repair your bond.
What Couples Often Come With
Ongoing arguments that go nowhere
Communication breakdowns or emotional withdrawal
Disconnection after the arrival of children
A lack of intimacy or sexual closeness
Pain from past betrayals or breaches of trust
A sense of growing apart
Navigating major life transitions together
One partner wanting more than the other
Desire to deepen the connection and understand each other better
You don’t need to be in crisis to benefit from couples therapy. Sometimes it’s about prevention. Sometimes it’s about re-finding each other.
My Approach to Couples Work
I incorporate a psychobiological approach (PACT), which draws on neuroscience, attachment theory, and nervous system regulation. It helps couples understand the underlying patterns in their relationship — not just the content of the arguments, but the how and why of the dynamic.
In practice, that means we focus on:
Your moment-to-moment nervous system responses
How you interpret and respond to each other’s signals
How early attachment patterns shape adult relating
Building secure functioning — a partnership where both people feel safe, seen, and supported
Sessions are active, experiential, and often eye-opening. You’ll learn to interrupt old patterns in real time and discover new ways of being together.
Who This Work Is For
This work can be supportive for couples who:
Are in long-term relationships or just beginning
Have children or are child-free
Are in monogamous or non-traditional structures
Are recovering from ruptures or just feeling distant
I welcome all genders, orientations, and relational constellations.
What to Expect
Couples sessions are usually 75–90 minutes, allowing enough time for both partners to feel heard and engaged.
We’ll begin by getting to know your relationship history and what’s bringing you in now. From there, we’ll work together to identify the patterns, strengthen the bond, and build tools for navigating difficult moments.
The work is structured and deep — but always at your pace.
Ready to Begin?
If you’re curious about what couples therapy could offer, I invite you to book a free 20-minute consultation. You can ask questions, get a feel for the process, and see if it feels like a good fit.
“When we recite our relationship vows, perhaps we should say, “I take you as my pain in the rear, with all your history and baggage, and I take responsibility for all prior injustices you endured at the hands of those I never knew, because you now are in my care.”
“Fears and expectations that date back to earlier experiences of dependency, but that didn't arise during courtship or dating, are activated as commitment to the relationship increases. As a result, partners start to anticipate the worst, not the best from their relationship”
— Stan Tatkin
try a free conversation and see if it’s right for you
no commitment, pressure, or obligation
how does it work?
free consult
We connect for around 20 minutes, either in person or online. We talk about what you want to bring to therapy and you will get a sense of how I work.
session one
If we feel we can work together your first session will involve us agreeing on a treatment plan and any immediate strategies needed for your current situation.
be seen
Bring as much or as little of yourself as you feel able to and be seen and accepted, without judgement, exactly as you show up.