What is a Stuck Survival Response and how does it Show Up in Everyday Life?
Most of us think of trauma as something that happened to us — a car crash, a breakup, a betrayal, an assault.
But trauma is also something that happens inside us. It’s the imprint that remains when our body doesn’t get to complete what it needed to do to feel safe again.
That incomplete action is what we call a stuck survival response — and it can quietly shape our everyday life in ways we often don’t recognise.
Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn: Your Body’s Emergency Toolkit
When we sense threat, our nervous system activates powerful biological responses to protect us. These aren't conscious choices — they’re automatic, ancient reflexes:
Fight – Mobilise, confront, push back
Flight – Escape, run, retreat
Freeze – Go still, collapse, shut down
Fawn – Appease, please, blend in
These responses evolved to help us survive real danger. But the nervous system doesn’t only respond to physical threats — it responds to emotional and relational danger too.
When Survival Responses Get Stuck
In a healthy situation, your body mobilises and then completes the response. You yell, cry, run, shake, push, or collapse — and then recover.
But when the situation was too overwhelming, too fast, or too unsafe for you to complete the response — it gets stuckin your system.
You might have:
Frozen during a childhood punishment, but no one helped you move through it
Wanted to run during a frightening conversation, but stayed smiling
Wanted to fight back during an invasive moment, but couldn’t risk more harm
These unfinished impulses stay stored in the body — not as memories, but as patterns of tension, reactivity, or collapse.
How Stuck Survival Shows Up in Everyday Life
You might not notice it at first. It doesn’t always look dramatic. It often shows up like this:
You leave conversations feeling drained and confused, but can’t remember what you wanted to say
You over-apologise, defer to others, or feel panicked if someone is disappointed in you (fawn)
You feel a surge of irritation or panic when your partner or boss asks you a simple question (fight or flight)
You go numb or foggy in high-stakes situations, unable to think clearly (freeze)
You struggle to make decisions — especially under pressure — and often feel “frozen” between options
You constantly scan others for cues of safety or rejection, even when things are “fine”
These are not personality traits. They’re adaptations — smart, resourceful ways your body learned to survive what was once too much.
Why Talking About It Isn't Always Enough
Many people come to therapy saying, “I understand where this comes from. I’ve talked about it a lot. But I still feel stuck.”
That’s often because understanding doesn’t move the body.
Stuck survival responses live in your nervous system — in your muscles, breath, posture, and impulses. Until we work with the body, we’re only addressing half the story.
So What Helps?
Healing stuck survival responses means creating the right conditions for your body to finally do what it couldn’t do back then — at the right pace, with the right support.
That might mean:
Tuning in to small physical impulses and letting them complete
Feeling the urge to say no, and letting that energy move through your body
Imagining pushing something away and noticing what your nervous system does in response
Letting a freeze begin to thaw — not through force, but by building safety
In trauma-informed somatic therapy, we don’t push the body. We listen to it. We follow what it wants to do — slowly, respectfully — and allow healing to emerge from within.
Final Thought
You’re not broken. You’re not too much. And you’re not overreacting.
You’re carrying a survival response that never got to complete — and your body is still trying to protect you.
When we work with these patterns gently and directly, real change happens. Not just in how we think — but in how we feel, relate, move, and choose.
If you're curious about this work, I offer a free 20-minute consultation to see if we’re a good fit. You’re welcome to reach out.